Day 38 I'd be Lion if I didn't say I wish I was losing more weight.

Today's Flow One 6-7:30 class was a curious one. Pippi taught and as usual her super positive energy and infectious smile made me relax. She asked the usual "do we have any injuries" when we were about to begin and she turned to me and said "anything else Shelly?" I was like whoa! It's curious that I wrote about not feeling part of the clique yesterday but when she said my name tonight I felt otherwise. My ego was happy to get recognized but then I felt like people were looking at me. Why do I feel in some part bad about being acknowledged? There goes that brain...

Pippi talked about the change in the weather and how being cool outside affects the body (and therefore the practice) then demonstrated modifications and offered some time to "do free form yoga, keeping the core engaged without being stuck in the breathe." This was fun but it made it hard for a spaz like me to concentrate. Flailing my arms and having oujai breathe was too hard so I did a few frog like things and a LOT of Simhasana or Lions Pose. This pose rocks! Maybe because I'm a Leo.. Maybe because I carry a lot of tension in my jaw and it releases like a mofo ( a monastery mofo :-) or maybe because it feels good to look like a freak show.

I put myself right up front again but there were so many people that she asked us all to move up a foot. This put me right in front of the speakers. We're talking like 6 inches from my face. It was so loud I couldn't hear what she was saying and since I never wear my glasses, I was all "what in tarnation is going on?" I will never be that close again. I've tried just about everywhere in the room except directly in front of the instructor and I doubt I'll do that anytime soon so front and to the right may be me for a bit.

Teachers often read passages or say awesome messages etc... and Pippi's message of the day was to recognize the things you want to change and allow yourself the freedom to imagine it, do it and be it. I know I have the freedom to choose. It's just choosing the right thing (calories) that I seem to have the problem with... I want to be losing more weight. I'm very happy in knowing that yoga reduces cholesterol, stress and joint pain but I want nice arms and a healthy stomach.

Stomach. Just seeing the word makes me think fat. Maybe because it's the beginning of the sound "st" as in stretch- and the ending of "ch" sound as in -mark. Healthy in shape women don't have stomachs they have "tummies." I'll settle for anything less than a gut. After all... I don't even like beer!