Day 90 Mission Complete

Whew! I made it! I came pretty close to my goal of 90 classes 90 days with 87 classes total.

Today I did a Flow 1 from 6-7:30 with Pippi. It was a pretty funky class. Once again WAY too overcrowded and the woman next to me was oozing the smell of booze from every pore in her body. It was pretty nauseating.

I will never ever get used to walking into a hot sweaty smelly room and being told to "inhale deeply." I honestly must have some kind of germ thing because it truly grosses me out. It's no different than going to the gym where people don't wipe off the machines or when you sit down on a toilet that someone has pissed on. Disgusting.

The class was completely full and this made people talk over one another while they were setting up for class. It felt like camp. Giggling, "OMG's" and lots of complaining. I was having a very hard time concentrating. There was also a feeling of being in movement class at a performing arts college. A lot of "make your own sounds" (of which every actor and basic spaz took advantage of) which I don't usually mind. When in an acting coaching class event.

Truth be told, I was hoping for a more serious practice to finalize my 90 day project. I wanted to feel graceful and peaceful. Not silly and wild. I know a lot of people enjoyed the class and the chance to act out while doing Yoga but I was saddened. Cest la vie.

I know that I want to keep Yoga as a continual practice because when I am involved my joints ache less, my mind is more clear, I sleep better and I am calmer in general. I don't know if I'll be doing it every day but I definitely want to go at least 3 times a week.

Thank you everyone for your support and comments. It meant a lot to me. I will post occasionally about how it's going so please keep in touch.

Namaste

Day 89 rinse and repeat...

What a weird day.. in trying to catch up I did 3 classes today. Meditation at 12 at the Deepak Center, Meditation at Sonic at 2:00 and then Flow 1 with warrior woman from 5:45-7:15. A huge difference in styles. DC center is all dark and focuses on the candle while Sonic's meditation today was focused on breathing and chakras. I like the mini classes at Sonic. They are always so informative. (I think because the only people who go to meditative are students of the program)

Tonight's class was awesome. I really think WW is my favorite teacher by far. She was the very first teacher and class that I had and has by far spent the most amount of time with me answering my questions and just talking about the process of my practice. I still can't do a forearm headstand and want to so badly! I know that there are some people who may never have it, but I hope I'm not one of those people. I do know that the likelihood of me doing a crazy split while in it is not too good...:-)

Tomorrow culminates my 90th day. I can't believe how fast the time flew by...

Day 88 Ohm Ohm good

Ahhhh is all I have to say. I did two yoga classes today. Both meditative. I feel pretty mellow now and am a bit bummed that I have to get revved back up to do a show in a few hours. Both classes were at the Deepak Center and I think they only have 3 people who do the meditation classes. I've been going awhile and have only seen the three. Both times today were tiny rasta chick. She asked me if there was something bothering me especially since I came to both classes. I told her about my blog and she thought it was awesome.

I guess it is awesome but I don't feel awesome. Well not as awesome as i thought I'd feel. I need to incorporate this into my almost everyday lifestyle and not think about it. Or have to blog about it to do it...

Day 85 -86-87 3 for 1?

Ok so the wedding weekend wasn't exactly the carefree time I'd imagined and I didn't get in any class. So that puts me 5 behind now.

I took class tonight and it was a pretty funky experience. There were 38 people in the class! I literally banged my foot against the door about 5 times. I purposely chose the very last row near the door because the room because the class before was packed and once again the sickening thick air was almost unbearable!! I don't understand why they can't air the room out between classes even if it's just for 3 minutes. Seriously. there is no way breathing that in is good for you.

I know I harp on this a lot but it happens a lot. Even with my own mat, I get other people's sweat from the floor. Anna Kournakova was teaching and she was doing a lot of sun salutations. Her suggestion was to dedicate our practice to someone who needed help. even if it was us. I skipped out on the headstands and opted to stretch my back in a few assisted bridge poses. Nothing relieves lower back pressure like that.

I'm pretty beat and know I'll sleep good tonight...

Day 84 Meditate and procrastinate

Well I managed to get in a meditation class today which is good because I will need it for this weekend! I leave in a few hours to drive upstate for a wedding. I've managed to wait until the very last minute to pack and I feel like I will forget something.

I can't believe that I am almost at the end of my journey here. This week is going to be hard to catch up I have to admit. I have a big show on Friday night and have planned rehearsals all week. Maybe I will have the guts to do an EARLY class as well as an evening class to catch up! We'll see. Right now I am gearing up for the weekend and will try as I said before to get in an online workout at least.

Day 83 Just Breaaaathe...

I am very aware that my 90 days are up in one week. I took two classes today. Meditation at noon and Flow 1 at 6pm. It felt great to meditate with a group again even if it is with mostly business people. Why should that matter? I don't know. I don't even know why I said that. there's that judgment again! *sigh* I guess that's why they call it a practice and not a perfect.

The flow class was with Pippi and as usual she had nothing but great energy. I was still a bit weary after last night and felt less confident than I normally would. I am having balance issues again. I've noticed that as soon as I REALLY let go and make my mind blank I'm steady... but the minute my mind wanders *BOOM* down I go.

I've also noticed that when I am in wheel I can't exhale. That's right. I can't exhale! The part that is supposed to relieve the tension I can't do. It feels like the breathe that I hold keeps me in position and as soon as I let go there will be no support... Wait a cotton pickin minute... can this be a metaphor of how I'm afraid to release in my own life? I can't think of anything that I haven't confronted but I must be open to that possibility.

I'm glad to be back in class. I leave again this weekend for a wedding. Yes, on Halloween. And no, it isn't themed (must to my chagrin.) I plan on taking class tomorrow and doing downloaded class on Sat and Sun unless i get back in time for the 5:45 class.

Day 82 whew!!!

Wow. I went to class tonight after not going for almost a week and my body let me know it did NOT appreciate it. It was by far my least favorite class out of every class I've taken. Since I started my journey, I've incurred a few injuries and weak spots. I am very aware of these spots especially my right knee and left ankle. My right knee I've somehow managed to get a slight tear in the ligament. It's curious because I can move a million ways but when it's just the riiiiight spot it's excruciating...

This particular class was going to be done by Warrior Woman but she had an emergency and asked Earth Mama to step in. Normally I like her align classes and figured that since this was Flow 1 I'd be good. I was wrong. I was already feeling vulnerable from missing class and had in general, a very emotional day. The practice was going to be "Poses that scare you" in the spirit of Halloween. I was immediately pissed. I wanted a normal class where I could ease into my poses and feel good about what I was doing. Instead it was every pose that I completely suck at. Head stand, forearm stand, crow, side crow, yogi splits and back bends.

I tried very hard not to be upset especially when she asked us to breathe in "Peace" and exhale "Judgment and Expectations." As much as I hate to admit it, I'm built around judgement and expectation. I "expected" class with flow. I "judged" EM for changing the routine because she thought that's what WW does around this time of year. I expect that I will be honest in my practice but I judge myself when I can't execute what I see in my mind and feel in my heart. Peace seems much less exhaustive.

I also had a person next to me who was a teaching/student who was taking class. She was telling me how to pose and where to put my hands and every suggestion was incorrect and set my wrists on fire. EM even came over during one adjustment and told the asst to stop. I know she was trying to help but my perception was different. It didn't feel nurturing.

To make matters worse we were facing each other for some reason which always bites. It's too hard to find Drishti (eye focus) when you're a foot away from two peoples faces. The back of a head doesn't draw near as much energy to the eye as a face.

It did feel amazing to do a lot of the poses and I absolutely need to start practicing everyday again. My body needs it. My poor body.

To my body:

I'm sorry that I treat you so poorly. You may be weak for now but please, please, never give up trying. You make movement and life possible. It's a dishonor to your gift I know, but have mercy because I want you to be my temple.